Buggish Whimsy l-5†
 
                        «1»
She says, “Pour me a shot”;
He says, “No, I will not”;
And then he starts with the sniggers.
“Why take just a shot When I’ve got such a lot?
I’ll gladly give you several chiggers”!
 
                        «2»
It’s really a bitch
To itch, itch, itch,
Awake, far into the nights.
But to scratch causes pain,
So you try to refrain,
Lying still, with all of your mites!
 
                        «3»
There once was a gal from Necedah
Who hated to see a mosquitah;
But add chiggers completah
From feetah to seatah,
And now a mosquitah’s a treatah!
 
                        «4»
A chigger lurks high in the grass,
All set to waylay the lass;
She slips him some skin,
He leaps o’er with a grin,
One quick dash and he’s safe on her…thigh.
 
                        «5»
Everyone knows
Of the wild Irish rose,
The one with the beauteous fig-gure;
But ask her to dance,
In search of romance-
She becomes then the wild Irish chigger!

†Inspired by a Wisconsin cousin who garnered in excess of 150 chigger bites
during a brief and abruptly-ended June sojourn in southern Illinois
 
by Terry Anthony, M.D., Ph.D.
Department of Behavioral and Social Sciences